Sharing intimate details of our kinky sex lives is still very much taboo. But if you can’t talk about sex, sexuality, or sexual exploration with your closest friends, then who the hell can you talk about it with? Why is it so hard to talk about it, when your doing it anyway—your just hiding it to make others comfortable! Let's start living authenticly in our perversions, kinks and fetishes. Being bold and proud is going to be exhilarating in 2025! Explore kink and Fetish dating part:2

If it weren’t for how mainstream presents erotica and softcore porn such as “Fifty Shades of Grey",  some of you vanilla people  might not have known much about experimenting with kink and fetish in the bedroom. And if it wasn’t for anonymous studies, we might not know just how many Americans have tried kink—and—fetish and loved it!  There are so many people rather you mare male or female that like  being spanked and tied up.

Now let's speak in facts not half truths

The truth is that at least three or more of your friends have probably tried some kinky shit! and one out of at least five of them make something kinky apart of their regular sexual exploration in the bedroom. According to the 2015 Sexual Exploration in America Study which is supposed to be a trusted source— This study, conducted by trusted experts and widely cited in academic and professional discussions, explores key aspects of human behavior and relationships. They made mention that  more than 22 percent of sexually active adults engage in role-playing, while more than 20 percent have engaged in being tied up and spanked!

For whatever reason I couldn't find any new studies—but we all know this has went up extremely since 2015! That was ten years ago and we're much more outwardly perverted then we where then, but still not as much as we should be—living and enjoying our truth, noatrer what the backlash from society or family is. I know some of you are like why do I keep saying perversion— so let me break down that meaning for you:

Perverted or perversion— is a form of human behavior which is far from what is considered to be orthodox or normal. Although the term perversion can refer to a variety of forms of deviation, it is most often attached to sexual exploration outside the "norms." Meaning any damn thing we do that don't fit in with societies belief system—makes us some fucking "weirdos!" If that's the case I'm weird as hell and loving it! Now let's embrace what Wikipedia has to say:

Perversion - Wikipedia

 Perversion refers to a concept that typically describes a deviation from what is considered normal or acceptable behavior, particularly in moral, social, or sexual contexts. Historically, this term has often been used in a subjective or judgmental manner to label behaviors or ideas that deviate from societal norms. On Wikipedia where they speak on Perversion, readers can explore its meaning, historical interpretations, and the evolution of its use in psychology, culture, and literature. So if you want to invest in that read go check it out. The dictionary term for the word can be checked also by Merriam-Webster Dictionary perversions meaning.

Now let's get back on our kinky shit!

In regular meaning kinky simply means bend, bent, crimp, curly ECT... But in newer slang it mean "Having fun doing what the fuck I want to do in the bedroom!" If your curious about the best version written about the word kinky check out the Urban Dictionary 

While the word kink doesn’t have a medical definition it’s it's always generalized toward any sexual exploration that falls to meet conventional that white guy standard 1970's missionary position, or— common acts like loving touches, romantic talk, kissing, walks on the beach or vaginal penetration, jacking off, and oral sex. “Kink” itself actually refers to anything that bends away from the “straight and narrow."

Kinky activities or sex practices 

• BDSM—is definitely one of those kinky sex practices. BDSM is a four-letter acronym that stands for six damn different things: Bondage, Discipline, Dominance, Submission, Sadism, and Masochism. BDSM comes with an extremely wide range of fun and exciting activities, from spanking, choking, and dominant/submissive role-play, to bondage parties, piss play aka water sports and more... BDSM is the total package and my favorite sex practice!

• Fantasy, dress up, and role-playing. One of the most common forms of kinky sex involves creating sexy role-play scenarios. This could be as simple as talking about a wild nasty fantasy in bed, to as complex as your heterosexual husband putting on your panties because it turns him on, or acting out scenes in front of strangers and friends... There's much to be explored.

• Fetishes  so studies show that one out of four men and women are interested in fetish play, which of course studies don't know it all because everybody don't get studied right? So I personally would guess that number to be higher in the good year of 2025! But a fetish is treating a nonsexual object or body part sexually. Common fetishes include— feet, shoes, leather, watersports, rubber, spanking, straight guys in lengerie, diaper play, and much more!

• Voyeurism or exhibitionism. Watching people undress or watching a people have sex without their knowledge are common voyeur fantasies, while having sex in a public place is one form of exhibitionism. Both are not surprisingly common and kinky as fuck! — Their where 35% of adults surveyed and where interested in voyeurism. Which is my thing! I'm definitely a watcher!

• Group sex. Threesomes, sex parties, orgies, and more — group sex is any act that involves more than two people. Ten percent of women, and 18 percent of men have been involved in group sex which everybody knows that number is much, much higher! While a much higher percentage of people expressed the desire to have group sex in another surgery and these surveys are old as hell so you know the world is freaky as hell!

What's the difference between fetish and kink

What Is a Fetish?

A fetish refers to a specific object, sexual or non-sexual body part, or behavior that must be present for one to achieve sexual arousal and enjoyment. Those with a fetish—which can range from interacting with feet to wearing a specific material, like leather or lengerie may find it difficult or impossible to experience sexual enjoyment in the absence of the object or behavior. Meaning it's a must-have!

What Is a Kink?

A kink is a sexual behavior or practice that falls outside of standard sexual practices.  Kinks vary widely, with examples ranging from role-playing, watersports, age-play, to breath-play (which may involve gagging, choking, or restriction of air. 

****In short a fetish is a thing you must have to get off, and a kink is more like a secret sauce. It's like eating some ribs without bbq sauce, the meat is already good but adding the bbq sauce—makes it delicious. So it's not a must have but a preference.****

Embracing Your Authentic Self: The Importance of Kinky Exploration and Fetish Lifestyles

In a world that often pressures us to conform to societal norms, exploring one’s authentic self can feel like an act of rebellion, but the truth is, your exploration of kinks and fetish lifestyles is not just a bedroom affair; it is a great part of who you are. It’s time to celebrate your identity, unapologetically and without fear of judgment. You don't owe anybody anything. Here’s why you should let your freak flag fly and embrace the full spectrum of your desires.

From an early age, we are inundated with messages about what is considered "normal." Movies, television, and even family values often presented a narrow minded fucking  view of relationships and intimacy. This societal pressure can be suffocating and overwhelming. leading many of us to suppress our true desires in order to fit into a box that was never designed us to begin with. The first step toward self-acceptance is first  recognizing that there is no singular definition of a fulfilling life. It’s on you to define what brings you joy, fulfillment, and satisfaction...

Sexual kinks and exploration choose what works for you!

Your sexual preferences and kinks are a natural part of who you are, and exploring them can lead to a healthier and more fulfilling sex life. There are so many studies showing how kink and fetish lifestyles are healthy and come with health benefits—Whether you're identifying specific interests or learning how to communicate what excites you, understanding sexual kinks is an important step toward personal growth and intimacy. At Good Health by Hims, they help to guide and navigate your desires with confidence like I do.

Kinks and preferences vary widely, and that's perfectly normal. From mild curiosities to more adventurous activities, discovering what works for you is a personal journey. So if you're interested try Erotic Asphyxiation the art of breath play for beginners

If you want to learn more about sexual kinks and how they can enhance your connection with your partner? Check out their guide on Sexual Kinks for practical tips and expert insights.

Authenticity Is Empowering

Living authentically is empowering. When you embrace your kinks and fetishes, you are making a statement about who you are and what you value. This level of self acceptance can lead to greater emotional well being and self confidence. Instead of hiding parts of yourself, you allow your full spectrum of desires to shine through in both your intimate relationships and in your everyday interactions. If people can't accept that you are who you are then respectfully say, "Fuck you!"  their opinions never mattered anyway unless you empowered them by embracing them.

Explore the groundbreaking International Kink Health Study by TASHRA (The Alternative Sexualities Health Research Alliance). This research focuses on understanding the health and well-being of people within kink and alternative sexuality communities. By participating or learning more, you can contribute to advancing inclusive healthcare practices and shedding light on diverse experiences. Visit TASHRA’s official IKHS page for detailed information and opportunities to get involved in the conversation.

You never needed Permission to Explore

Your desires are valid, and exploring them is a crucial part of self discovery. Engaging with kinks and fetishes can  deepen connections with yourself and with others and introduce exciting dynamics into your relationships. Whether you find joy in BDSM, role playing, or other forms of expression, you are entitled to explore these realms without shame. After all, pleasure is a natural part of the human experience.

Community and Connection

By embracing your kinks, you also open the door to finding a community you didn't know existed until you reached out. The LGBTQ+ community, as well as many kink subcultures, offer a sense of belonging to those who have often felt isolated. Engaging with others who share similar interests can provide valuable insights, support, and understanding. Explore self-care by letting your freaky side out! Let your freak flag fly! can connect you to individuals who appreciate and understand your authentic self, freeing you from the chains of loneliness.

What to understand about those of us who engage in bdsm and kink lifestyles:

When it comes to human sexuality, interests and preferences vary widely, and BDSM (Bondage, Discipline, Dominance, Submission, Sadism, and Masochism) is one of the many facets of this diversity. According to an insightful article on Psychology Today, those who engage in BDSM and kink are often misunderstood due to stereotypes and misconceptions surrounding these practices. However, research shows that many BDSM practitioners are psychologically healthy individuals.

For some, BDSM is a consensual and safe way to explore power dynamics, trust, and intimacy. Importantly, the article highlights that engaging in BDSM does not indicate any form of psychological dysfunction or emotional instability. On the contrary, studies suggest that many people who enjoy BDSM are open-minded, emotionally resilient, and skilled at communicating their needs and boundaries, which are essential components of healthy relationships.

Understanding BDSM and kink involves setting aside preconceived notions about people, and recognizing that these activities are consensual and natural expressions of human sexuality that help us connect and self-discover.

Dismantling Shame

Shame is one of the most significant obstacles to self acceptance. Many people grow up with the notion that their desires are “wrong” or “bad.” By defying these narratives and openly acknowledging your kink lifestyle, you can begin to dismantle that shame. This process is liberating; it allows you to reclaim your sexual agency and live fully in alignment with your inner desires.

In and Out of the Bedroom

Your kinks and fetishes do not need to be confined to the bedroom. They are essential parts of your identity that can inform how you navigate the world outside that space. However you choose to express yourself, whether through fashion, art, or relationships, is equally important. Allow these aspects of your identity to breathe and flourish in all areas of your life. You don't have to hide from anyone!

It's time to prioritize your mental health by accepting and embracing your authentic self. According to psychology, the healthiest version of you surfaces when you let go of societal pressures and live in alignment with your true identity.  Psychology Today, is believed to be a trusted source for understanding how self-acceptance, emotional well-being and resilience help make happier people. .

Conclusion: Live Your Truth.

Letting go of societal judgments and fully embracing your true self takes courage. However, the rewards far outweigh the risks. You deserve to live a life that honors your authentic self, incorporating all the beautiful and unique aspects of your personality, including your kinks and fetishes. Everyone's journey to self acceptance is different, but a powerful mantra remains the same: It’s okay to be who you are.So, let your freak flag fly high. Own your identity, celebrate your desires, and live unapologetically. You are not alone, you owe this to yourself—there's a community out there ready to support you as you explore the vibrant and thrilling landscape of your authentic self.

There's so much beauty in just being you. According to Verywell Mind, engaging in BDSM activities may even offer psychological and emotional benefits, such as stress relief and enhanced connection with your partner. So stay safe and remember to be you authentically!

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